Women Corner

How to avoid being annoying in a relationship

October 1st, 2009 |

So you’ve found a new man and for a while things were going perfect. Then all of a sudden the bottom falls out of the relationship and you’re back into the singles category. You’re not quite sure why he doesn’t call you anymore, why he’s slow to respond to your phone calls. Heck when you guys talk it seems like he’s a million miles away anyways. And then before you know it then hammer drops and he saying: “It’s over.”

How can you find out what went wrong? Well first and foremost it’s not always your fault. Some guys are just flakey….in fact A LOT of guys are just flakey. However, if this keeps happening over and over again out of nowhere then it’s very likely that you are unconsciously sabotaging the relationship. Here are a few things you could be doing wrong.

1. Bending Over Backwards For Him

Are you complying with every little desire or whim your man has? Are you making sacrifice after sacrifice to make sure he’s happy? Believe it or not that’s not going to win his respect or love…ever. You could be the most gorgeous girl in the world, busting at the seams with money and might have 100 different things in common with him .However a big part of dating for a guy is the “winning of affection” This is the traditional “courting” phase of a relationship that is supposed to be a little nervous for the guy. If all you are doing is bowing down t whatever he wants then how in the world is he supposed to respect you?

2. Calling Him Constantly

Are you a pest? There’s nothing wrong with communicating every day with your boyfriend. If he says that’s smothering him then there’s something else going on that’s causing the problem. However if you are calling him 10 times a day then even the most patient of guys are going to get annoyed. Remember, your man isn’t going to care (nor should he) about every small minute detail of your day. Give the phone a rest already!

3. The L word.

We like to call this dropping the “L bomb” and it can be a real relationship killer. OK…unlike what you might think or what the movies might portray, people typically don’t fall in love at the same time. Both parties of a couple aren’t going to always be ready to say “I love you” at the same time. Sometimes it can take several months for one party to feel the same way as the other does. There’s nothing wrong with this. We’re all different and we all have different pasts. I t could be that he was hurt at some point and is a little gun-shy about dropping the “L bomb”. Give him time and don’t pester him about a simple 4 letter word. If its love you and he will both know it in time. Just let it happen and enjoy the time you have together.

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